Just a reminder to the dudes in my city.
Not saying that there aren’t two chick duos hoping to hook up with a man. There totally are. Just like… It’s supply and demand, guys. They don’t have to post an ad to find it, and they probably won’t respond to yours, because they aren’t looking for it on Craigslist. They can look for it at Target, the gas pump, the emergency room, and find no shortage of gleeful takers, without having to hear some petulant asshat whine about bots/men/fatties or how the INTERNET IS BROKEN because no one is sitting on it yet.
It’s advertising, boys. You’re kinda shitty at it, and the market is saturated.
Craigslist Gloryhole takes all comers. It’s inherent to the subject matter. Most of our readers are here to laugh with us, and we love you for it.
Other folks are here entirely by accident. They had a very different goal in mind when they typed their charming search string into Google. Instead of finding local Scandinavian twins with an oral fixation, they found us. We cherish this.
Everyday, a dude or two asks the oracle for “ww4m” and lands here instead. This makes me feel like I have performed a public service. I am not being sarcastic. It gives me a deep and abiding satisfaction.
To that end, here is a screenshot of the terms that brought lady-lovin’ randos to the site today. Enjoy.
Hey, Lesbian Ladiez. Do you love a dildo but wish it could be attached to a man who talks and makes demands and wonders if you have any snacks in this house? Oh, you don’t? Because you’re a lesbian? Welp. Shit.
“I’m a Brazilian panty model. My leggy Scandinavian girlfriend and I are getting tired of totally lezzing out all the time. There are only so many pillow fights two hot, oiled girls can have all by their lonesome. We’ve been debating which one of us would win a blow-j contest, but we can’t find anyone to judge. Don’t know if anyone would be interested in helping us out, but we figured it was worth a shot!” – No one. Anywhere. Ever.